10 Good Qualities To Look For In A Man

Finding the perfect guy can be a tall order. After all, tall, dark and handsome seems to be what women claim to want.

But when it comes down to living with Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome, some women find that they prefer a man to have certain qualities over looks.

Pining after men who can make them laugh, who cares about their family and friends, and who supports them through the ups and downs in life is actually more important to women than looks.

It’s why so many women find themselves falling for guys that wouldn’t normally be on their radar: these guys have got it going on in terms of boyfriend qualities and even husband qualities that women secretly look for, and often are disappointed about, in Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome.

Here are 10 great qualities to look for in a man:

1. He’s got a head on his shoulders.

The perfect guy is smart. There are no two ways about it. Guys who have a head on their shoulders, as the saying goes, are quick thinkers and problem solvers.

They see the big picture and don’t get caught up in the details that can slow them down. 

In a relationship, this quality can go a long way because he can figure things out and is not afraid to fall down a few times on his way to finding the right answers.

Also, a study has found that the smarter the man is, the less likely he is to be unfaithful.

2. He has the same values as you.

An important part of any relationship is the compatibility of values. If your guy isn’t aligned with what you want in life, no matter how good-looking he may be, the relationship won’t last long.

Men and women have different opinions about a lot of things, but if you can find someone who thinks the same way you do about the big things: life, marriage, money, travel, charity.

When you meet someone who has the same outlook and wants to focus on the same things, your relationship is much easier.

3. He can break the tension with a joke.

The perfect guy can break the tension with a well-placed joke. He might not be overly funny, but he can make you laugh when you need it most.

A sense of humor is high on a woman’s wish-list for her perfect guy. And it’s no wonder: guys who can make you laugh are worth keeping around.

In fact, a study has found that humor ability reveals intelligence and predicts “mating success”.

Life is hard and if someone can break the ice, release the tension, and make you see things from a different perspective, he’s a keeper.

4. He cares about your friends and family.

Guys aren’t known for their empathy or communication skills. If your guy is tuned into your friends and family and asks about them, cares about them, and treats them with the same respect he treats you, that’s a good thing.

When you are dating a guy who can get along with your dad or your best friend, that says a lot about him.

It’s hard to bring new people into our lives, but if he fits right in, that’s good news for you.

5. He gets that your career is important to you.

Some men are intimidated by an independent woman, but not your guy. If he gets you and what you are all about, he’ll get that your job is important to you.

Whether you work for someone else or run your own company, he gets that you don’t just need to work, you want to work. It’s an important part of who you are.

The perfect guy will be able to give you all the space you need to make things happen in your life.

6. He respects you and what you bring to the table.

Sometimes, it’s hard to find someone who sees the best in you. If you’ve had a string of failed relationships, you may be feeling vulnerable to allow this guy into your life to see what you are all about. But don’t worry, he already knows.

He can see what makes you special from a mile away and he wants you to celebrate how awesome you are. He knows how smart you are and what you can bring to his life as well as your own.

And this is a good thing, according to Dr. John Gottman, author of The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work.

He says that if a man rejects his female’s partner’s influence, it may be a sign he has power issues.

7. He understands that love requires work.

No relationship is perfect, even with the perfect guy. But that’s what makes him so perfect: he knows that he is going to have to show up and work at this relationship so that it will last.

He isn’t taking anything for granted. Understanding that you’ll have ups and downs in your relationship means he’s ready to do the work and make things work between the two of you.

8. He is your biggest fan.

He loves how you are a rockstar in your own life. He doesn’t feel put out by your success and he wants you to show up and shine as often as possible.

He knows how great success feels and he cheers you on in your own work and life. The perfect guy knows you have things you want to do in life and he wants them for you as well.

A study published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that couples who celebrated each other’s achievements were more satisfied with their relationships than those who reacted negatively or were indifferent.

9. He’s tuned into his emotions.

The perfect guy not only has his finger on the pulse of your relationship, but he is tuned into his own emotions.

Understanding where his thoughts and feelings come from helps him stay in the moment and not get upset by what is happening around him.

He’s grounded and can help keep you grounded too. He also understands that you aren’t responsible for making him happy and just being with you makes him happy.

The perfect guy isn’t easy to find, but if you stop looking for external features and start looking for internal qualities, the ones that get you through the tough times and help you feel safe and secure in your relationship, you’ll find him before you know it.

10. He knows how to use his manners.

It’s not that men are rude, but when guys have proper manners, they really stand out.

Guys who hold doors, pull out chairs, say thank you, ask how you are doing, introduce you to other people in a way that makes you feel important.

Manners imply that a guy is putting you before himself. It implies that he is thinking about you and the other people around him.

You might not put a lot of stock in someone who has manners, but it says a lot about his upbringing and what he values in other people, as well as himself